Not a baby anymore

Okay, so I already came to the conclusion that my baby wasn't a baby anymore when he was carrying on conversations at his 1 year old birthday but this milestone of moving into a big boy bed was the hard one for me.
All parents (or maybe just Mom's) get sad at every milestone. I didn't do that. I loved saying goodbye to the binky, couldn't get rid of the bottle quick enough and welcomed him walking (even running) and I loved when he started talking and was able to communicate with us. They didn't make me sad at all. This milestone hit me really hard and I am not sure why. We moved Bryce into his "big boy bed" and "big boy room" last night and man was it hard on Tim and I.

Two nights ago we attempted a sleepover with him and Braiden and after two hours of Braiden saying "Bryce be quiet and go to bed" and Bryce laughing at Braiden I decided to go in and cut the sleepover short. Braiden headed back to his room and Bryce told me that he wanted to go back to his crib. I gave in (because I am exhausted) and put him in his crib where he went right to sleep.


The next night I decided to do our nightly routine and keep everything the same as we do every night. So, we sat in his bed and read our books and then I tucked him in and shut out the light and left the room, just like we did when he slept in his crib. He cried for a little bit and we laid in bed and listened on the baby moniter and then Tim couldn't take it anymore and went into check on him. Poor little guy just wanted his dinosaur blanky from his crib (yep, he has a brand new bed with matching bedding and he wants his old blanket). As soon as Tim cuddled him up with his blanket he was quiet as can be and out cold. I laid in bed wondering what he is going to do if he wakes up. Will he head upstairs, maybe out the garage or will he come and find us. I was a mess. So about 2 o'clock I feel a little poke on my cheek and open my eyes to see Bryce staring at me. It was the cutest thing to wake up to. I said "hey buddy do you want to go back to sleep in your crib or you big boy bed?" and he wispered "my big boy bed". So, I walked him back down to bed and tucked him all in cozy and didn't hear from him until I had to wake him up the next morning at 8 o'clock. I would have left him in his crib until he didn't fit if I could have. I get so nervous that he can get up at night and walk around. This was the big milestone that made me really feel like I have lost my baby!